Overcoming Same Gender Attractions

This article is reprinted by the kindness and permission of Jayson Graves, M.MFT. We encourage you to visit his Healing for the Soul website and learn more about this important work. More information about Jayson and his work is provided at the end of this article.

Early beginnings

I remember the first boy I ever had a “crush” on: his name was Robby and we were both 12 to 13. I just remember noticing him in a different way and wanting to be close to him. I wouldn’t call it necessarily a sexual thing although I’m sure he may have showed up that way in dreams. Rather, the feelings I had towards him were more about wanting what he had: he always seemed to be very positive and confident and was one of the popular kids yet showed kindness to the likes of “nerdy little me.”

Looking back at that today as a counselor who specializes in helping men with sexual addictions and unwanted same-gender attractions, I can see that it was part of the beginnings of the distress I would feel about these feeling over the next 2 decades. The beginnings had roots in more than just feelings, however—they were the result of many factors—understanding these and seeking the road map to God’s grace has been the key to overcoming. Read more