Where are you in the addictive process?

For those of us who suffer from sexual compulsions, we tend to feel isolated and alone. We do what we do in secret and don’t talk about it. We worry about being found out. We worry what is going to happen to us next. It remains our dirty little secret. What we would learn if we would begin to come forward and seek help is that sexual addiction is a highly researched area of study. Much is known about it and there are many places and organizations who want to help. You might be surprised how many are available in your community.

If you want to know what stage you may be in for your compulsive behavior no better description exists than the process outlined in the SA manual known as the white book. Those of us who have found ourselves in this addictive process can testify to its accuracy. If you resist the temptation to deny your problem, you can easily see where you are and where you are headed–if you don’t seek qualified help. The hope and prayer of the men of the Purity Project is that you ask us for help before you find yourself well along in this cycle. But, no matter where you are, we stand ready to help you.

Summary of the Addictive Process

• It begins with an overpowering desire for a high, relief, pleasure, or escape.
• It provides satisfaction.
• It is sought repeatedly and compulsively.
• It then takes on a life of its own.
• It becomes excessive.
• Satisfaction diminishes.
• Distress is produced.
• Emotional control decreases.
• Ability to relate deteriorates.
• Ability for daily living is disrupted.
• Denial becomes necessary.
• It takes priority over everything else.
• It becomes the main coping mechanism.
• The coping mechanism stops working.
• The party is over.

For the sexaholic, the progression is relentless and inevitable. Within any given moment of our lives, however, we were unaware of the extent it had driven us and refused to see where it was leading. Like revelers riding a raft down the river of pleasure, we were unaware of the awesome power of the rapids or the whirlpool ahead. (p. 37)

The preceding information was taken from Sexaholics Anonymous Manual, a.k.a the white book or manual. This book may be ordered online from any number of sources and is recommended reading. The Purity Project is not affiliated with SA but very much appreciates the work that it does.