Am I really that sick?
Last week a young man was sitting in my office. He’s a young college man, about 19 years of age and seems to have everything in the world going for him. He has exceptional good looks, great health, intelligence, and before long will have a college degree. So what’s wrong? He’s also addicted to porn and says that it’s been a problem for him for the past eight years. According to his story, he’s tried to break this habit on numerous occassions. He’s made numerous promises to God and himself, stopped cold turkey a number of times, and once talked with a youth pastor. Because he’s a religious guy, he feels miserable and believes that he’s let God down. I asked him if he’d ever thought about joining a support group. He replied, “I have, but I’m not sure I really belong, I don’t think I’m as sick as they are.” I think every person who has ever fought an addiction can relate to the statement of that young man. To us our addiction is more of a pesky problem than a serious illness of the soul. Denial keeps us from admitting we have a problem and doing what we need to do in order to get better. Read more
The Pornography User’s Big Blind Spot
I’m very fortunate. I work in a place that doesn’t require all of us to wear a suit and tie. Our code is that you should look nice, be presentable and feel comfortable. The other day I decided to go for it. I wore a nice shirt, tie, coat and slacks. No doubt about it, I looked great. Around noon I discovered something. I had been going from place to place and department to department with my zipper down! I could not help but wonder how many people had seen my predicament and decided to say nothing rather than embarrass me. The same is true about life. All of us have blind spots; the parts of our lives that others can see but we cannot–and some of it can be pretty darn embarrassing. When I was heavily involved in pornography, and all that goes with that affliction, I had a huge blind spot. I couldn’t see it, but those close to me could. Even today I am still coming to terms with just how blind I was. The blindness I am talking about is selfishness. Read more
Surefire ways to remain addicted to porn
Remember, the following is a parody of a serious problem. Take the opposite of what we say!
Now-a-days there are any number of websites giving advice on how to quit a porn habit. Though we are sure that these sites mean well, we think it is about time that someone or somebody writes an article to help the person who wishes to keep their porn and/or sexual compulsions intact. We must warn you that keeping a porn habit going over the longterm is a fine art and takes dedication. However, if you will but try, it is possible to keep this habit going for years upon years. It is with this in mind that the people of the Purity Project of Oklahoma City offer you ways to keep your porn habit always active. These have been field tested by our people who successfully used them for many years. Because we firmly believe in truth in advertising, we think it is only fair to warn you that when we stopped doing the things we describe in our article, our porn habits promptly went away. At the present moment, none of our members are under the influence of porn, so you may well need to take what we say with a grain of salt. Read more
The Insanity of Sexual Sin
The following article has been reprinted by the permission and courtesy of Steve Gallagher, at Pure Life Ministries at http://www.purelifeministries.org. We encourage you to visit this fine website for more helpful information.
The hearts of the sons of men are full of evil and insanity is in their hearts throughout their lives. (Ecclesiastes 9:3)
Society deems a person insane who has lost touch with reality and has become irrational in his thinking. Such a person has long indulged in extreme pride and self-centeredness and has lost the ability to differentiate between right and wrong, real and unreal.
Men who habitually give over to sexual sin enter their own form of insanity. Although most sexual addicts can still function in life-hold a responsible job, pay the bills, interact with other people-their thinking about sexual (and spiritual) matters becomes extremely irrational. Their insanity is not primarily of the mind but of the heart. Read more
Four ways of living with pornography
To those of us who struggle with pornography, and other sexual problems and compulsions, there is always a heavy tension in our lives between what we feel on the inside and what we have been doing with our lives. Inwardly, we want to be the kind of person that could be fully known by others. We crave intimate experiences, relationships and friendships. We crave transparency–to be accepted for who we are. But we know that, with the exception of a few, this cannot be. That’s because we understand that the moment others become aware of how extensively involved we have become with our pornography and sexually compulsive behaviors all sorts of unpleasant consequences may arise. Our friends may have drinking or gambling problems that are thought to be unfortunate; but, pornography is a problem that instantly marks us as perverted. We feel perverted because we cannot explain our apparent constant need to drink in the images and videos. Some of us have long passed the innocent stages of pornography that involved an occasional peek here and there and the images we crave now are truly hideous. Though we may have a carefully crafted exterior that makes look like we have it all together, each of us wonders what others around us would really think of us if they only knew.
As one who was fully engulfed in pornography for more than 15 years, here are the four ways I found that people, like myself and others use, to live with pornography. All of them involve intentional choices on our part. Read more
